Friday, February 12, 2010

Liking What I Like: Part 2

Wow two posts in one day...I'm thinking way too much (the previous one is here).  Sometimes I think I'm way too picky about what I want in a guy, and I need to expand my horizons.  It's not that I have a set criteria that a guy HAS to match for me to like him, and I don't think I want to have one.  I generally know what I would like in a guy though...likes/wants kids, has a spiritual background, preferably doesn't drink and definitely doesn't smoke, and is a hard worker whether it be in a job or in school.  I also know what I'm generally attracted to...guys younger than me, and guys of a different ethnic/racial background than me. Not sure why that is, but it just is. Age and race aren't deal breakers for me though. And none of it matters when it comes to making friends.

The thing is, it seems like guys that match both my physical attractions and non-physical likes are few and far between.  And when I find one that matches all of them, I tend to fall hard, since I don't find them very often.  And since they are so rare, I idolize them and think they are the perfect guy.  I try not to communicate any of that to them, though, since I don't want to scare them away.  But generally, they don't find their likes and attractions in me...they like and are attracted to something else.  And since I'm a sensitive guy, it hurts for awhile. It's not their fault that their wants don't match mine, theirs "just are" just like mine are.  But it makes me wonder if there are any guys at all out there for me, or any guy that I'M the perfect person for, since this semi-rejection happens again and again and again.  People tell me I'm such a good guy, that I'll find "the one" sometime, but maybe it's time to give up and focus on reality...be satisfied with good friends (and the ones that I have are definitely good) and give up hope for someone that likes me as more than a friend.  I don't really see my likes/attractions changing too much, so I shouldn't expect that others should change theirs either.

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